Last week I did something bucketlist-worthy: I met William Shatner. And he was a feisty diva.
If you know me, you know that I am very rarely outwardly excited. Like, I would be the worst person ever to win concert tickets on the radio because I would just be like , “that’s cool *awkward pause* thanks.” So you know that elation on my face is true excitement.
We got in line an hour and forty five minutes early to meet the Shat. You would think that the line would have a solid nerd/hipster mix. But no, it mostly obese dudes in their 30s wearing elastic-waisted pants. That being said, we were somehow the only ones with homemade shirts — and jeans that button.
Here are some creeper pics that my bestie took:
Those are black pajama pants.
That’s a fanny pack.
Those are big dudes not making eye contact with the 24-hour fitness across the street.
Are we horrible people? probably.
The guy behind us was in his 40’s and was in line to get William Shatner’s autograph for his daughter as a surprise. Awwww. Mad A+ dad points right there. Unfortunately, the guy behind him was a drunk. He was in his 30’s, and kept making the same joke about whether Shatner would sign a Leonard Nimoy album to every Amoeba employee that passed by. He also had conspiracy theories about the Amoeba mailing list. Occasionally he would exclaim, “Why would anyone want to take a picture with an 80 year-old?” Please note that this dude waited an hour and 40 mins to meet Shatner. Also please note that he bleaches his hair, but dyes his sideburns and eyebrows red and he wears John Lennon glasses. I am actually pretty surprised that he didn’t smell weird?
So yeah, we finally met him for like two seconds and I am pretty sure that he didn’t make eye contact and I am sure that he didn’t say anything about our shirts. But he didn’t have to, he is William Shatner, a man who showed up in a car with the license plate “DIVA19” lolforever.
BTW, I am performing at Upright Citizens Brigade Los Angeles next weekend. Come play!
Ashley Jillian 
u have heart girl. DIVA19 ? re UCB – break a leg. continue…
Thanks!
Truly bucket list-worthy! But the diva wouldn’t pose for pictures?
oh no, that was the policy of the record store. The store had a staff photog who supposedly took our picture when we were speaking with him and they will put it online. Knowing my luck, it will be the worst/best picture ever. He would only sign his stuff that came out last week, though, and that’s pretty diva.
No, you aren’t a horrible person. You are comedian. Making fun of people is what you do, right? Glad you got to meet the Shat. I’d like to meet William Goldman before he kicks the bucket, but I have a higher chance of winning the lottery or getting hit by an asteroid, unless the dude lives forever.
man, your fav. William is far more academic than mine
That is awesome!
I’m from the Bahamas and also had the privilege to live in Nashville for a while. I’ve met a lot of celebrities over the years but the best encounter I ever had, was having Pierce Brosnan open up the door of a hotel for me. And he is double OH MY Gorgeous! LOL.
ANYWAY! Love the post you are not horrible, I do this sort of thing everyday. Except, you got to meet Shat too.
Pierce Brosnan? Yum!
Brosnan is very yummy… even with a scruffy beard.
Great line – big dudes not making eye contact with 24 hr fitness! ( love your observations about people)
thx!
Yeah, great line.
super thx!
I saw the host from the show, The Renovators yesterday. You wouldn’t be fussed because the show is a sub-par Australian reality show about renovating. Yeah. I wasn’t that fussed either.
I think you win with Shatner.
idk, I love D-list celebs. Like the time I saw Sassy Gay Friend. Best.
Remember the hospital drama that was on for one season a few years ago? And remember the main character? I met her! Yeah, it wasnt too momentous, but it was cool.
I don’t really have the attention span for hospital dramas, I don’t think I have ever even sat though one.
“Like” a billion. And jealous x infinity.
girll, you’ll get your chance someday
I am seriously laughing so hard right now. Totally reminds me of Triumph the Insult Dog, which then I had to go to Youtube and watch – it never fails to leave me peeing in my pants…
lol
So. Very. Jealous. As Napoleon Dynamite would say, “Luckyyyyyyyyy….”
lolol
Have you heard his music??? His cover if Mr. Tambourine Man and Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds will have you laughing until your sides hurt. So bad that it’s good. 🙂
yup. His new album is even better!
Haha! Mostly obese dudes wearing elastic waisted pants! awesome. Hey I might come to your UCB final SO DONT SUCK! OK?! 🙂 jks jks
I am inviting you on the Facespace right now
You have truly touched the face of God…he did let you touch his face, didn’t he? I tried to touch Leonard Nimoy’s face and he phaser’d me. Fortunately, the weapon was set on stun.
I probably would have licked his face if he let me. You know, for the life experience.
Fanny Packs are awesome, what are you talking about? lol. Seemed like you had FUN. that’s awesome.
I probably would have more fun if I was wearing a fanny pack, TBF
Laughing after the second sentence. Thanks for that 🙂 Also super impressed that you didn’t work in “I almost shat myself in excitement” somewhere in your post, ha. Way to keep it classy!
I was tempted, but I try to get my Shatner cliches to a minimum. As a general life rule.
Performing at UCB would be on my bucket list. 🙂
I don’t actually have a bucket list. I would rather spend my time doing things than just dreaming about them. y’know?
So, let me get this straight. You paid good U.S. currency to see William Shatner? I do not know you, but I have lost all respect for you. I have added you to my do not call list.
I didn’t pay to see him in the technical sense, it was a free signing. Also, I really DGAF is you respect me. lalalala my blog my life my rules.
AJ not to be a h8r which I LOVE, an wholeheartedly agree with, doesn’t come up when u click on it??? (in a stern voice) did u do something naughty to the robot? anyway, very funny, and so true. continue…
Exclusive content for e-mail subscribers/ I trash posts when I don’t think they are very funny. Choose one of those as the reason.
How come there’s no pic of you with the Shat? At least a shot of his fat neck from behind?
the store was supposed to put them online and they haven’t, yet. I really hope a picture exists, and that I don’t look awful in it.
People who make their own puffy paint shirts for the very special occasion of meeting a celebrity they worship just happen to be on my top-ten list of favorite kinds of people.
You two rocked those shirts! And the elastic-waist crew were definitely jealous.
Thanks! And I hope they were! haha. I mean, I would be.
Ultimate coolness and your comments on the crowd made the piece. Congrats on meeting the Shat. My geek genius/Goth (Mom I am NOT a goth. jesus!) SFU student daughter would have dug it. Me too.
she sounds like me AKA super cool!
Loved your post and Love W.S., He’s the Man! Great job on the shirts – reminds me of the time my friends dragged me to a Star Trek convention. I stuck a red t-shirt over a black turtleneck, pasted on a cardboard Enterprise doohicky and jammed a Freddy Kruger mask over my head so I would blend in, ha! (by the way, don’t ever eat onion rings before wearing one of those) Nerds wearing elaborate makeup and Klingon Princess costumes were taking pictures of ME – go figure. Break a leg at UCB!
William Shatner. Has he had work done? He sure looks good for his age. Lucky girls.