Real Estate head shots make me lol. Too real.
Marlene gets bonus points for having a motto that doesn’t actually mean anything.
“A field of opportunities, success through effort”
She also gets bonus points for having flowers grow out of her head.
Joseph has “Integrity and Commitment” and he’s the “agent of the month” which is somewhere between fast food employee of the month and James Bond on the sexy scale. Hint: much closer to the greasy end.
This is just awkward.
Wait, I don’t understand their motto.
“We Care about being #1 for YOU, not the world!”
They must be so embarrassed by how awful their motto is that they can’t even stand to look at each other. It’s hard for me to look at them, too.
I am going to finish with this one.
What? Did the camera break or something? Is the photo black and white because the ad is vaguely racist and the realtor doesn’t want you to know what race s/he is? Or for that matter, I can’t really tell the gender. I am uncomfortable.
p.s. I really want to hear more of your awkward stories. Leave a comment here with your best story and I will love you forever.
Ashley Jillian 
I like the real estate motto: We’ve upped our standards. Up yours.
I am slowly becoming obsessed with bad real estate mottos.
NO WAY! Ahahahahhahahahaha
Pretty weird. My only real estate story is about when we sold a house. We had it on the market by ourselves with open houses, fresh flowers, no toothpaste in the sink–the whole deal! We had a few lookers, but finally hired a real estate agent. The next door neighbors bought it sight unseen. Okay, no snarky realtors in this story, but much frustration–and the neighbors had rats!
Thanks for the smile today.
AJ, this is so fucking funny. if u hadn’t a done it i would of…eventually. well spotted, well done. continue…
You realize these are signs of the end of days.
Marlene needs to wash her ears more often 😆
lol
Brillaint! I wish we had these in the UK, I’d pick my agent purely based on their blurb appeal. I’d be torn between Marlene as I would need to know if it’s a wig, or Cougheys just because…
hmmm it kind of makes sense that these are just an American thing. We’re ridiculous.
Delightful observations 🙂
This post is great. LOL. I love things like this.
I always thought real estate ads were/are weird.
LOL!! I can’t even describe to you how happy the last one made me…who would actually use that?? I mean, clearly you’re not a very successful real estate agent if you can’t even afford to take a photo of yourself…
Awesome post, my friend…awesome.
You’re very imaginative. Corny and totally terrible real estate mottos. How did you find so many?
The Internet is a bizarre place
lol smh
We had a real estate agent in my city who was on the side promoting turtle preservation. I’m not kidding, she legally changed her name to “The Turtle Lady.” That really sticks with you when you’re looking for someone to sell your home, to turtles that is.
LOL. Things like that remind me to never underestimate how weird people can be,
Lol. Sad that they couldn’t put more effort into their mottos. I wonder what my mother’s is, as she is one too, but I pay little to no attention to her business cards.
– LisaaLinh @ BitchinRants.com
“A field of opportunities, success through effort” sounds like a bad translation of some ancient Cantonese proverb.
I think/I hope it is
Your blog is hilarious. Love the first real estate headshot. You could do a whole site just on that. Good work!
That last one is just insane. I share your confusion over the realtor’s race/sex — but I’m also not sure whether the animal in the picture is a cat or a dog.
Hahaaaaaaa!!!!!!
I posted this in the wrong story LOL. That was a moment well, please delete the other. I will re-post here.
I work with realtors and the ones that get me the best are the ones that have outdated photos. You meet them and you have NO clue who they are. Nice post. I was cracking up.
hahaha I haven’t laughed this hard for a while. I agree these are weird!